Fate. Predestination. The universe. Maybe even God. Basically, things move in strange ways. Sometimes we move ahead because we study, and learn, and climb, and claw our way ahead. Other times, we need to be kicked in the ass (pardon my French) to take that step that gets us going in the right direction.
Over seven years ago, my wife, Shirley, and I were living in Maryland. We both had good jobs, and we liked what we were doing (for the most part). My company was going through some problems and had put themselves into bankruptcy - reorganization. A short time after that, Shirley's company declared that it was moving to Jacksonville, Florida and taking some of its people with it. While waiting to see if she would be offered, my company closed down leaving me without a job. When Shirley's company finally offered to take her with them, the choice was rather simple, one job, or none.
Although I didn't know why, I felt we were getting pushed out of Maryland, out of the Baltimore area. We were getting pushed away from all our friends, my family, everyone we'd become acquainted with. Now, that move obviously happened for a reason.
While down in Jacksonville, Shirley eventually moved to a better job with more pay. I made contacts in the holistic healing fields, received training in Reiki and other things, went to school for massage, and learned what I really want to do with my life. Basically, I became the person that I am now.
In the past few months, I have been very busy with my 'day job' and had little time to do healing and such. I have managed to do some teaching, and Reiki healings, but for the most part, business has been slow to nonexistent. I was starting to feel a little low about it yesterday when fate stepped in and gave me a very swift kick in the ass (there's that French again).
My boss called me into his office for a heart to heart talk. This is always disconcerting as I usually end up on the lower end of stuff traveling downhill. The basis of the talk had to do with the company's financial situation, and how they would be cutting back on a lot of things at the end of the football season, especially staff. The bottom line is that I was being offered 'early retirement'.
For a while now, a lot of things have been hurting me, and keeping me from moving forward, business-wise and personally. My not being available in the daytime has kept me from doing massage then. My not having a place has hurt as well as not having any marketing skills. (The marketing skills will have to come.) The other thing is that I am so stressed and brain-dead at the end of the day, it makes it very hard to go do anything else. The source of this stress, of course, has been the 'day job'. But now, one of my hopes has come true... I won't have that 'day job' to hold me back. It is unfortunately also one of my fears.
I have been told many times that if I just up and walked away from this job, that the business would come. I acknowledge what a true leap of faith this is, to walk away from an income that pays the mortgage on the house and many other things. And quite honestly, I haven't had the trust in myself or the universe to make that move. Well, now the universe is telling me (actually forcing me) to do just that.
A few posts ago, I mentioned that I was ready to move on. In the light of current affairs, I'm not really sure I am, but I don't have any choice. A lot of emotions have gone through me, anger, depression, relief, happiness, fear. I want to go ahead, yet am afraid to. I have never been in my own business, and with the 'safety net' gone, I know I can't fail. The funny thing is, is that it was just a couple weeks ago when Kellie Jo told me I'm supposed to be in my own business now. She didn't say that I would be real soon, just that I am supposed to be. Well, here it is. Now I just need to learn how to market myself, and get some business going.
This may be the opportunity that I've been hoping for. I just need to take hold of it and move ahead. I believe it was 'Colonel' Harlan Sanders (inventor of Kentucky Fried Chicken) who said "life begins at 70." Well, I'm certainly not that old, but I'm not a spring chicken, and I am at an odd point to be changing careers. It was the Christina entity channeled by Kay that told me I would be doing healing full time in five years. That was almost five years ago. Don't'cha just hate it when they're really, really right?
Yes, when you seem to stall, or stall yourself, or just plain old get lazy, the universe has an almost perverse way of letting you know when you need to move on. All right, all right. I'm moving already.