I had a new client in today for MFR to see if they could help her migraines. It was a short session, and I will never see her again.
Yes, I’m going to rant again.
I do everything I can do to educate my client ahead of time. I have them read and sign forms. I explain everything I can so that there are no surprises when I start to work. Well, sometimes, no matter what you do, you still end up getting screwed.
This lady came in last week for a consultation (which I do at no charge). She had been given an article I had written from a friend dealing with treatment for migraines. We talked about a lot of things including Reiki and Myofascial Release (MFR). I explained what each does and what it can do. I also gave her literature and pointed her to the website. She decided that MFR sounded good, and that she would like to try it, so she scheduled a session.
Now, as anyone that has talked with me about MFR can tell you, I go into a good deal of explaining when I talk about it so they know what to expect. I tell them that MFR works to align the body as a body that is in alignment tends to stay healthy. I tell them that it has to be done skin on skin, it can’t go through clothing. I also tell them that MFR bases a lot of what it does on what is called the Pelvic Floor. The pelvis is aligned and everything is built up from there. And I do explain that especially with migraines, the alignment of the pelvis is the key to helping get rid of them. And I do explain that sometimes the positions can be kind of personal because one is aligning the pelvis. Yes, I do say all this. Every time.
Today, she filled out the forms. We talked. And I left the room while she got on the table. When I came back in, she was ready, undressed to her underwear, under the sheet. Now, when people leave their underwear on for MFR, sometimes it needs to be moved out of the way so one can work. If the clothes get into the movement, the connective tissue (fascia) in the body can’t move because the motion is being stopped by the clothes.
I had been doing back and side holds, feeling the fascia release and stretch. After about 30 minutes into the session, she was face down and I placed my hand on her low back, fingers below her underwear. She told me she wasn’t comfortable with this. Not wanting to stop a move I had already started (as each hold is three to five minutes), I told her that this was where I needed to be to do the move. Then I started thinking.
My response was not right. I was setting up for a compliance situation, something I do my best to avoid. Compliance is where the client or patient (if we are talking about doctors) is uncomfortable about something, yet they let it happen anyway because this person working on them supposedly knows more than they do. I have heard way too many horror stories about sleazy therapists who put their clients into compliance situations.
I stopped my movement, and got down and talked with her. I explained (as I had before) what is involved with MFR, and where I needed to work. Based on her current alignment which I wrote down before starting, she has a lot of pelvic issues and needs a few moves there including one that is truly bizarre (the pelvic float), but effective. My client told me that all the time she has gotten massage, no one has ever worked beneath her underwear. Unfortunately, MFR demands that this area be worked to align the pelvis. I mean, I could have sent her to Tim down the street, but he is a male and would have to work in the same areas as I was going to. I could have sent her to Natalie in Orlando (two hours away), and even though she is female, she would have had to work in the same places.
She told me that she was not comfortable with me working below her underwear. So, I told her we were done as she would not let me do the work she needed to help her. And I was certainly not going to force her to get the work or create a compliance situation.
She had told me that she has gotten relaxation massage before from a masseuse (and there’s that word again) and they have never worked that area. (My basic rules are that if the client leaves their underwear on, they get compressions rather than real work. Of course that is for regular massage.) She told me that she has never had a male work on her before. And it is not like she didn’t know that part coming in.
I told her that I am a professional, and am not about to do anything that will jeopardize my license. But if she is not comfortable, she is not comfortable.
I charged her for the 30 minutes I worked on her. She was expecting to pay for the full session. I saw no point taking money for something that I did not do.
I guess it just sucks. I mean in this day and age when business is slow because of the economy, to have a new client come in the door who because of her discomfort, to have the session cut short, and to know that there will be no repeat business. It is not because I was unprofessional. It was not sexual. It was simply because of her comfort level. And it all could have been avoided if she had listened to what I had told her last week. Ugh!
I guess I’m just pissed because I would have rather not worked on her than to have to cut the session short.
So, not only do I lose money on a session, and not get any repeat business, I can not help her because she won’t let me. Now that truly sucks.