Empath. Being an empath. What is it? What should it be? Here’s something that will surprise you. Empathy is just a diagnostic tool.
First off, let’s cover some basics. An empath is a person that can sense other’s emotions. Think Deanna Troi on Star Trek: The Next Generation... “Captain, I feel fear. I feel anger. I feel... bad script writing.”
Now while science fiction writers like to imbue their characters with mega-power, in real life it usually doesn’t happen that way. Most empaths can feel other’s emotions, but not to this level. Ever walk into a room where everyone was upset? How long did you stay there before you were upset, or had a headache? Ever walk into a room where everyone was happy. Felt good, didn’t it?
All too many empaths feel these emotions, but do not know if they are their emotions, or someone else’s. It is like looking at everything you are feeling and asking if there is a reason to feel this way. I do it way more than I like to, as do many others I know. So while it may sound sexy, it is a real pain in the backside. We don’t necessarily know if we are taking on someone else’s emotions and reacting to them like they are our own. In fact, it is a real issue for therapists not to take on their client’s problems.
Many people that are empaths get into the holistic healing modalities. They become massage therapists, counselors, and more. But here is what I was told...
Empathy is there to know what someone is feeling, but so you can act from a point of strength. It does no good for an empath to take on someone else’s emotions and wallow in what they are feeling (to wallow in their pain or sadness). It is there so you can help them and be strong for them. Being an empath is like doing a diagnostic test. You see what is going on, learn from it, and treat with this information in mind. The person that takes your blood, a phlebotomist (and I’m sure you’re surprised I know that) does not take on the blood.
Think about it. Empaths all too often take on their client’s problems. Instead, they should be looking at what they are picking up, letting it go, and then treating based on what they learned. It is a hard thing, but it is where we need to be.