We had our monthly mediumship class today, the first since Dad passed. I was not looking forward to it.
I have been able to be very strong through all the stuff going on. But the meditation at the beginning lost me a lot of that hard edge, and made me soften tremendously. With that, I lost my ability to keep out things I did not want to think about.
While watching another reading in the class, I had to get up and leave. I was a mess. My energies were all over the place. I went into another room and calmed the best I could. When I finally came back in, I was in the best control I could be, but not where I needed to be.
I tried doing a reading for Marilyn, and brought through her Mom, but could not hold it. So, I had to stop, and then Marilyn read for me.
She started out by doing a psychic reading, which was part of today’s exercise. She said that she felt I was on the fence about what to believe. I do believe that we pass from this plane or vibration to the next. As much as I have talked with people on the other side for people, I know this is true. But the sadness within me is not from them being gone for them, it is from them being gone for me. In other words, I can’t just pick up the phone and chat any time I want. And no matter how skilled I am or may someday become, it is not the same.
So Marilyn brought through my Dad's neighbor, whom he used to work with many years ago. He used to live two houses down the street from us. And surprise, I recognized him, which is something that does not happen too often. She said my Dad felt I was not ready to talk to him yet, and that was probably right.
But this neighbor did tell me that he was there with him, and it was like old times, off playing golf and such.
Hoping I get me act together by next month's class.