Last night I participated in my first public mediumship demonstration... and... well... it sucked.
There were seven mediums presenting, and 13 audience members. Many were friends and family, but a few were just general public. Our task was to present two different spirits, one at a time to the group and hopefully have someone recognize them, then pass on a message. The term for this is Platform Mediumship.
One at a time, the mediums got up and described the person they had. Most of the spirits that came through were recognized, but some were not. What got me was that even the people that I think are really, really good, were having troubles. As each one presented, the energies in the room drained. By the time it got to me, I was pulling at vapors. And I was the last one to perform.
I brought through someone, but it came down to two people that it could be for. Using a technique that Eamonn had taught, I got them to each say “It’s for me.” I was immediately drawn to the couple, but the energies were fading. I felt like I was pulling at straws. When they asked a specific question, I went with the answer that presented itself, and was told I was wrong and it was not for them. Ok, so I was 0 for 1.
I then saw a young girl that was killed by a driver while on her bike. I had mentioned the dress she was wearing, the time period, the style of bike. I said that she looked like she was getting a picture take. What I think I missed was that what I was seeing was a picture. That might or might not have helped. Marilyn finally offered to come up and help, and I said yes. She got the same information I did. We both had the details, but no one recognized who it was. Ok, 0 for 2.
My wife had come because she had never seen me work. Afterwards I told her, “ok, so you’ve seen me work.”
I was really beating myself up over it. I caught the phrase “Well, you’re just never going to be any good” go through my head. That’s when I caught it. I felt something did not want me to continue in what I have been doing. That’s when I told it to go screw itself. I decided that I do have the talent for this, and spirit, good kind, helping spirit wanted me to be strong and continue. That was the moment my energies changed, and I realized the strength I had in me. That was the moment that my resolve kicked in, when the realization of giving in to the darkness was too easy. That was the moment when I realized that this is what I was going to do, and that I was going to get better, no matter what.