Along Came Bones

The original song talked about TV westerns and how they were all the same on every channel.  It talked about the hero (Jones) and how he comes along just as some dastardly villain was doing something dastardly to the his girlfriend, like tying her to railroad tracks as the train was coming.

When this was written, it was during the first iteration of FreeFall, and the song called for three voices and the group only had two performers.  This is one case where the writer had to fill in as one of the voices.  Thankfully, that part was talking and not singing. 

To the tune of

Along Came Jones

Performed by

FreeFall, Iteration 1

Along Came Bones

By Brian Dean and Shirley Dean

 With Apologies To The Coasters and Ray Stevens

I sat down in my easy chair and turned on Fox 45.

They were playin' Star Trek, and man-o-man alive!

Kirk was with a creature of stone he'd hit with a phaser shot.

That creature was trying to protect her eggs, and now she'll die for the lot.

It's hurt!

Oh no it's badly hurt!

It's feeling waves of pain!

There's waves and waves of pain!

It could die...

It's gonna die! What are we gonna do, what are we gonna do??

(chorus) And then along came Bones

(spoken after last word) Blast it!, I'm a doctor not a bricklayer!

Smooth talkin' Bones

(spoken after last word) I said Blast it!

Kind-hearted Bones, humanitarian Bones,

Along came that Enterprisin' doctor Bones.

Commercial Came on and I got up to get myself a snack.

You should have seen what was going on by the time that I got back!

Spock had moved to protect Kirk from a poisonous plant attack.

He got hit and I'll tell you, a dead Vulcan I just can't hack!

He got hit by the spores!

Oh no, he's been hit by spores!

They're poisonous!

They're full of poison!

He could die!

He's gonna die! What are we gonna do, what are we gonna do??

And then along came Bones

Blast it!, I'm a doctor not a gardener!

Smooth talkin' Bones

I said Blast it!

Kind-hearted Bones, humanitarian Bones,

Along came that Enterprisin' doctor Bones.

 I changed channels on the set to see where Trek might be.

There was the same old shoot-em-up, the same old space opry.

Kirk was fightin' Mr. Spock for a girl that Spock shoulda had.

She had wanted someone else, and that for Spock was bad.

Kirk thought he could tire Spock out and that way keep ahead.

Kirk thought he had Spock dead to rights, but Spock just had him dead!

He's on the ground!

Oh no he's on the ground!

He's not breathing!

He's, he's not breathing??!!

Is he...is he...?

He's dead, Spock! ... What are we gonna do, what are we gonna do??

And then along came Bones

Blast it!, I'm a doctor not a miracle worker!

Smooth talkin' Bones

I said Blast it!

Kind-hearted Bones, humanitarian Bones,

Along came that Enterprisin' doctor Bones.

Along came that Enterprisin' doctor Bones.